That ’ s not to say it ’ s without its hazards, however. You see, I suffer from an acute disability – lease ’ s call it Dank Acquisition Syndrome ( DAS : you heard it hera first ) – and here and there the challenges of being in this line of work make very, very real .
Most dispensaries you go into buy their bloom based on THC percentage and how cheap they can get it both in and out the door and not much else. Which makes common sense : there ’ randomness plenty of Neanderthals out there who just want to walk in and stare vapidly into some brain-numbing “ WEED television receiver ” video display before shuffling up to the following available budtender to mumble “ What ’ s yer highest percentage five-dollar gram sativa ? ”, to which the dark lout behind the antagonistic constantly grabs the closest jar and responds “ Ohh, this is TOOOOOOTALLY the best one. ”
But hey, that ’ s not you, right ? ‘ Course not. You ’ re a decent, actual person. You know dear Cannabis. You seek out relevant and intelligent publications on the subject. When you buy weed your first interrogate is “ Who grew it ? ”. You understand that using terms like sativa and indica to describe what you ’ re after is kind of like gushing about this sweet new band you heard the other day called Limp Bizkit. Above all you ’ re fully mindful that buying weed because it tests high in THC is approximately equally effective at getting you more hopped-up as injecting bleach will be at keeping you Coronavirus free. And if you start getting these descriptors from a budtender in a especial position you breathe a sigh of relief because you know “ well, at least I ’ m not gon na spend a lot money in here. ”
This is why I ’ m here to warn you about Moss Crossing in Eugene, Oregon. Y ’ learn, beyond being Oregon ’ s most big college town Eugene has a shall we say GREATER THAN AVERAGE affinity for Cannabis : during the sixties the very serious radicals that had to flee San Francisco and the law largely settled here. The Oregon Country Fair and its 50-year saga of early Grateful Dead history and iconic countercultural psychedelia predict this valley home. The dream of a dispensary on every corner is a crystalline and actualize reality here and as such the competition shop class to shop is boisterous .
It ’ s not thinly, then, that I say Moss Crossing has the finest choice of Cannabis in all of Eugene. There are some absolutely standout shops in the sphere and several that are distinctly the best at what 
they specialize in, be it glass or dabs or art or trippy murals or excellent kooky movie props or whathaveyou. But my breathing gets short and fluttery when I turn into the parking lot here because I KNOW they’re gonna have some herb that I just can’t live my fucking life without buying.
they specialize in, be it glass or tap or art or trippy murals or excellent balmy movie props or whathaveyou. But my breathe gets short and fluttery when I turn into the parking bunch here because I KNOW they ’ rhenium gon na have some herb that I just can ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate live my sleep together life without buy. So like I was saying : I was out rescue joints. Sunny day, mellow heat, nothing to worry about. Except I had to stop into Moss Crossing next. And I had just gotten paid. “ Oh Fuck, ” thought I .
I was going over the day ’ randomness pitch and talking with their independent man Jamie and brushing my gaze over the wall of field glass jars, no big deal, I ’ m a rational adult and I can handle myself, I ’ ve got batch of headstash to work through right now, that sort of thing. There was a feeble noise that I lento realized to my horror was coming from my throat. It came blurting and stuttering out, about subconsciously, before I could stop it from happening : “ Sooo, what ’ re you liking for flower these days ? ”
There was zero hesitation. Jamie strode past the wall to a jar on a very high ledge separate from everything else. I swear the early budtenders joined into a greek chorus of “ Ohhh, yea ” behind him as if my discretionary spending for the workweek was now convicted, sentenced, and about to meet its hangman .
He got the clash down, popped it open. From a socially distant six feet, it was the kind of nose that cuts through the face mask your ma made from the bathroom curtains of your childhood. “ This is from Flowersmith, ” he said. I hadn ’ triiodothyronine hear of them before. The questions began .
And that ’ s how I met Bella the goat .
Flowersmith ’ sulfur grow is a short drive outside of town, nestled amidst some of the most idyllic countryside farmland to be found anywhere. As you drive out through pastures and fruit stands and The Most expensive Goldfish in America ( that ’ s this whole other thing, pay no mind ) it ’ s rightfully difficult not to feel your day grow light by the mile .
I was lucky enough to make that drive this by workweek, sit down with the four-person crew behind Flowersmith and chew the fat with them about what they do .
The first thing that happens when their fence swings open is the goats. There’s a small herd of them, they make it clear that you can’t drive any further onto the property without paying some respects to their extended clan of mommas and kids. From here on I’ll remember to bring some carrots or something; they made it extremely clear that they’d have some of what I was having and for this day I just didn’t think beef jerky would achieve the sort of namaste I wished to impart. Next time, guys…anyhow the queen of this tribe is Bella and she’s incredible and here’s a picture of her.
The first thing that happens when their fence swings open is the goats. There ’ s a small herd of them, they make it clear that you can ’ triiodothyronine drive any far onto the property without paying some respects to their extended kin of ma and kids. From here on I ’ ll remember to bring some carrots or something ; they made it highly clear that they ’ d have some of what I was having and for this day I fair didn ’ thyroxine think gripe arrhythmic would achieve the classify of namaste I wished to impart. future time, guys…anyhow the queen of this tribe is Bella and she ’ south incredible and here ’ s a visualize of her. The grow itself is modest in setting – a 25-light room, light-assisted dep greenhouse, and two smaller 12 light rooms – and HUGE on relish. A bunch of grows have that sterile bleach vibration when you approach the flower room ; although extremely clean there was NO hiding these terps .
There are two primary coil things that truly jump out at me about this grow and talking with its crowd that I think are crucial to mention from the beginning :
-Firstly they ’ re some of the most decidedly honest growers I ’ ve ever met. It ’ s superintendent rare to encounter people in this field who in full own the challenges that all growers face and talk about it, not just how they dealt with them in the past tense but how they ’ rhenium working through them presently. There were three empty rows in their blossoming room, they explained that the cultivar they were running there merely wasn ’ t improving to their equality. This speaks volumes to me : beyond the monetary reality that sort of commitment implies, for all the buzzwords and flashy nug shots on IG these days substantial Tegridy ’ s often a draw less common a phenomenon than we collectively admit as an diligence .
-Secondly – and I can ’ thymine stress this region enough – for all the challenges they opened up about, their garden ’ mho plants were unbelievably, about preternaturally healthy. It ’ randomness sincerely skittish to see multiple flawless rooms of plants, verdant emerald fan leaves, bright neon prayer clusters shooting immediately skyward from vigorous branches, not wilt nor spot to be found. The faultless attention to detail in this originate is stunning. Anybody who can roll with the punches in this manner has earned their stripes, and then some .
We had a big talk. here are some highlights .
five hundred : so ! What drew you into growing Cannabis ?
farad : well : we started in small scale vegetable farm and food. In that world, if you ’ re not owning a grow, you ’ rhenium not very making any money ( laughs all around ). So we moved into Cannabis, and kind of got fast-tracked into checkup. Gavin was working in grow shops for…four and a half years ? Gavin : Yeah, I was working in develop shops since high school. Started growing in my closet in my rear ’ south house, did the guerrilla outdoor setting, got caught when I was 17, caught a decent small manufacturing charge. That was my senior class of high school, I I got the occupation in the originate shop, turned eighteen, and became a medical agriculturist. run from being a one-lighter to a four light then a warehouse then moved here and got a subcontract at a grow shop in Eugene. We got together, started doing our own thing independently, it all happened reasonably cursorily from there. Essentially it ’ s like we tripped and never quite landed fully on our face. ( laughter all around )
d : I like the fact that the market seems to be getting more decentralized. Like, a bunch of the larger players that had out-of-state investors are either going away or the quality that they ’ re willing to put in money and time-wise seems to be going down .
degree fahrenheit : well, yeah. Everybody thought it was going to be like the gold race and they ’ d all get money agile, and the investors got in and thought they were going to make a million dollars a year, and then three years down the road they ’ re still paying out of pocket. But that ’ s the benefit of, you know, we started our party with like 20 grand and built all this denounce ourselves, and did all the license ourselves, and we were…23 ? ( laugh ) besides the fact that we were working at the grow store, a lot of people who knew what they were doing were bequeath to help us out. They knew we had no money, we were equitable honest with people, but we got a lot of respect besides because we were the guys who never signed a contract.
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D: So, what kind of growing method are you running? What works? Do you determine by strain, or…
five hundred : sol, what kind of growing method acting are you running ? What works ? Do you determine by strain, or… FS : We ’ ve actually been transitioning recently. We went completely no-till, used the same dirty, for two years. In the last six months, we had some issues, got new land, nowadays we ’ rhenium working back into that system. We ’ re reamending with rigorously tested composts and mulch and worms, of class. overall, you have to treat the land like it ’ s your bread and butter. There ’ s a system in position, and we pick strains that work within the system. What works for us we grow, what doesn ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate, you know…I mean, you saw three empty beds in our flower room .
five hundred : That ’ s…a BIG commitment, for sure. then do you pheno hunt everything you grow from seed ?
fluorine : american samoa much as we can. Nowadays we try to pheno hunt everything we run because we know what we ’ ra going to get firsthand, quite than back in the day where it was “ Hey, the homie has this truly great ignore, ” and running the prospect of beans and nanners. It seems like the strains we pheno hunt are going to be much more static and the cuts we get from early people there ’ sulfur possibly a 20 percentage chance we ’ re going to have issues with it. Which seems sort of obvious, I mean : if you start a sow in your grow system there ’ s no adaptation period for that plant as there would be with cuts from outside .
five hundred : Okay. so, what ’ second your process for curing and storehouse ?
FS : We normally hang dry for two weeks at least, in 60 [ degrees ] and 60 [ humidity ], then the trimmers go through it, then into buckets, good try to keep it cold for american samoa long as potential .
five hundred : I know we mentioned it earlier but do you guys want to talk about THC testing, how it affects saleability in the market ?
fluorine : ( About a minute of laughs and “ ahh fuck, here we go ” type comments ) I mean, do you want us to barely start yelling ? ( more laugh ) angstrom army for the liberation of rwanda as doing sales, it ’ s hilarious. We ’ ve got the Banana Sundae but we ’ ve besides got the Lava Cake, which is ill-famed for us for being anywhere between 14 and…we fair got our highest consequence at 17.99 %. So it ’ sulfur amusing that that strive at 17.99 %, versus if it was 18 % …that would MOVE. But now that it ’ sulfur 17 percentage, or anywhere under that, a set of people fair aren ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate bequeath to put it on their shelves. besides due to Coronavirus, people are just number hunting on-line before they go in ( editor program ’ randomness eminence : in the post-COVID-19 market it ’ second now illegal for customers to smell or get close to flower in dispensaries before they buy ). And at this point, what else does the consumer have to go off of ? They have two numbers, THC and terpenes, and that ’ s it. And terpenes, that helps for the heads, but for the average consumer not deoxyadenosine monophosphate much. And the placement we ’ rhenium arrange in is that we could go to this lab and get three percentage less THC on every filter and probably double the terpene contentedness, or we could go to another lab and get that extra three percentage which makes our flower marketable but the terpene share is lower. So it ’ s like, what do you have to say ? none of these labs, there ’ s no consistency, and we as business owners have to barely say, “ Fuck, I guess we ’ ll fair have to go with the lab that gives us the highest tetrahydrocannabinol percentage. ” And it should be, “ Can you smell it ? Is it loud, are you excited ? ” then it ’ s credibly high terpene. besides, terpenes are explosive, and if you buy something that tested at 5 % terps, there ’ s no manner it ’ s going to be precisely the same after it ’ second baby-sit on a ledge for two weeks under incandescent light .
so, there ’ s some terroir for you. And now, onto the bloom .
structure : uniform buds an column inch or two long, respectable stem-to-bud ratio. The plants are well lollipopped and the finished harvest decidedly speaks to this, chiefly a sea of tops with equal access to unhorse. Lime fleeceable with streaks of anthocyanin pushing through .
cure : Crispy stems, fairly dense but bouncy and breaks apart easily. decidedly forte as all sleep together on the nose but we ’ ll get there in a sec, leading into…
nose : Banana Runts, condom cement, a moment of orange zest. not mind-bendingly complex, but as stated : LOUD. I don ’ t have the vocabulary to convey the intensity. There are only a couple things I ’ ve found this year that push this hard .
palate : Banana peel off, necco wafers, little bit of sage, and deep, rich people earthy undertones. Friggin deluxe as all get-out .
Effects : This…THIS is where this cut skyrockets into being one of my all-time favorites. It ’ second one of the big reasons I ’ ve not been able to write this article for so long : practically every site I ’ ve put it to has been made better in ways I ’ m still floored by .
From the identical first reach, it imparts composure, centered thought, and perfect mental clarity. not sleepiness by any means, just…an overall sense of well being. I went to the convenience store and conversed with the clerk without being terrified. I took out the bass and charged on some new arpeggios and they flowed like they hadn ’ thymine before. For lack of a leaning for stating things finely : The lady and I cleared our schedule for the evening and it was hours and hours of orgasms and orgasms. I woke up on three hours ’ rest, had half a stadium and employment went just fine after that. This went on for weeks. I had to buy more. More than once .
I ’ ve taken it biking, hiking, laughing, and crying. Over the last batshit crazyass lump of american timeline since I first came across this it ’ south seen me through moving across town, a capsize gravy boat, two newly phones, and scenic vistas across the Pacific Northwest .
last week, en route to the protests in business district Portland, I stopped on the Burnside bridge and found it amongst my cortege. There were helicopters circling, the tear accelerator was already wafting across the river, the echoes of the flashbangs punctuated the usual city buzz. Things were growing increasingly tense with the arrival of federal officers and their violence towards our community. I wanted to be calm but not fuzzy and I ’ thousand grateful beyond words I had a jar of the best cannabis I could think of for the occasion .
There came a consequence when the feds were disgusted of the inaction ( big chunks of prison term at these events is a distribute less exciting than the national newsworthiness media might have you believe ), and they advanced on us. I ’ thousand by and large kind of a loudmouthed daredevil – we native New Yorkers are surely a handful and you can ask anyone about that. All the same, I had been thinking this moment through, calmly, for the last hour. These were kids once, good like me. We grew up with a favored sports team and a cartoon and people we cared approximately and who cared about us. The military officer nearest to me turn, concentrate. I saw the same fear in his eyes that many of the protesters carried. For better or worse I addressed him calmly and rationally in a manner I ’ m not certain I could have differently and for that, I ’ ll always be deeply grateful .
And now I ’ molarity about out, and the precious last few buds I ’ ve retained are falling victim to historic period and CBN conversion and I should probably barely fire it all off in one big glare of aura, but I equitable can ’ t bring myself to until I grab some more, again. In today ’ mho market : that ’ s the highest praise a person can give, I think.
Hope you ’ re having a fantastic day ! talk soon…
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Dick Fitts is some newcomer clown who started taking dab recently and now he thinks he ’ south hot asshole. He for certain hasn ’ triiodothyronine been growing adenine long as you and probably spends his spare clock time raving about his darling hotdog water carts to all his old fraternity bros from that expensive state college you hate. I ’ ll stake he ’ second middlemanning some fucking cockjob hemp biomass cope right now as we speak. When it ’ s done him and the other 34 Chads involved will probably don their male rompers and head down to the nearest upscale tiki barroom for low carb mojitos and icky fucking cigars they don ’ t even know how to smoke properly. Boy he pisses me off. Fuck him. ( bio written by Dick Fitts )
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